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8.28.2009

Montreat, How I Love You!

::Cue theme music... bum bum bum bum!::

If you have never been to Montreat, then stop reading! Hop in your car, and go! I promise you won't regret it! Every summer, I say, "I am NOT coming back... I cannot work another DAY in Montreat!" But alas.... I ALWAYS come back! Ha! Let me give you a little background before I announce my exciting news ;-)...

After I graduated high school, I started my first semester of college and Montreat. I was terrified, excited... and NOT ready. I had just moved into an apartment with my hubby to be, trying to work full time and go to school. What was I thinking? But no regrets. Sadly, I didn't finish my semester, I chose between spending a few last moments with my Papaw or finishing school. My conclusion? I can ALWAYS go back to school... but I cannot get those precious moments with my Papaw back. So here I am, 3 years later sitting in the AB Tech library. I went back to school... I'm enjoying my classes, but this place just doesn't feel right. So... cue music again... I'm transferring to Montreat! Woo! In January, I will be a Montreat student yet again, and I am stoked! I'm excited about going to chapel on Tuesdays and Thursdays, getting involved with Young Life and etc! I'm still going for Elementary Education, but it will be 5 minutes from home (as of right now), a familiar place, but most importantly... a Christian college with professors who are uplifting. I will be surrounded by God's beauty, and by familiar faces, so yay!

I'm very excited if you hadn't figured that out by now, I feel like I am following God's path for me. I want to stay at AB Tech because it's sooo much cheaper, but I know that's not what I should be doing. I have faith that Christ will get me through, and that eventually all of my lovely school loans will get paid off... that's one thing I do NOT look forward too. Ick.

So, if you are reading, please pray for me! This is a huge step for my husband and I financially and spiritually... but we are ready to take the challenge! Until next time, I bid you adieu...

8.26.2009

Killing Time

It is about 11am, I'm sitting in the library at school and I have a LOT on my mind! There is so much stress and really a lot of disappointments and a little bit of hatred (atleast what I feel) at home... sometimes it just feels good to come to school and relax. That sounds crazy doesn't it? Papers due, notes being taken, studying for exams... shouldn't be relaxing. Right now, for me it is. Everything is in order, everything is organized and I am at peace. I get home and all there is, is chaos, annoyances, etc etc. Some days I just don't even want to go home, if my wonderful hubby wasn't there, I don't know if I could.

It has also come to my knowledge that apparently things I write in my blog are being read... and taken the wrong way. So here is my answer to that. This is my blog. This is my outlet. I write so that I won't blow up and throw all my steam to my husband, my parents, and even my friends. If I didn't have this outlet, I think I would go nuts! I blow off steam here... it helps me relax and just let go. This has been the purpose for this blog from the get go. Sure, I could go home and lay all of my issues and stresses on my husband, but how is that fair? I talk to him about everything, but he has enough stress on him that I don't want to lay my burdens on him... so I lay them down here, written out so that I can work through my problems and lay them down before my Father's feet. The end. That's just how it is. I don't write to offend, I write to let go. I need my outlet.

8.22.2009

Where do we go from here?

This past week has been exciting, stressful, horrible, and wonderful all at the same time. Like I said in my last post, school is going great so far. I am enjoying my classes, and feel like I'm doing well getting my hw done and such. Our living situation and financial situation is not so great. I am still unemployed. There's a great possiblity of me working for a friend of mine, but we're not sure when that might be... so right now, horribly unemployed. Which means, we're living off of one income. Justin works his butt off, but even with all the work he does, his paychecks are GONE by the time he gets home after paying bills, and it SUCKS!

I had to get a new computer for school, there were no ifs ands or buts about it. We have a small laptop (one of those mini's), but you can attach the printer to it, it doesn't have a disc drive, and the screen is TINY. That's not going to work obviously. My parents have a dell desktop, but it's in my brother's room, and he's on it 24/7... so that wasn't going to work either. I was planning on buying a new laptop, but we figured it might just be easier to get a desktop and a portable harddrive to take to school (lighter and more portable than a laptop!). So we went to Walmart and found a Dell Desktop for $298.... this was originally at $498, so YAY! It works great, has plent of GB and space... and I am stoked. Now we just have to get Student Office & the portable harddrive and I'm set!

With that said, we come home, all excited because we aren't spending as much as we thought we would have to and my mom is NOT happy. Now mind you, I am an adult, I am married, my husband and I NEVER buy ANYTHING without talking about it first. Justin was ecstatic about getting a computer for a lower price, because that means more money when we find a place to live. So, Justin leaves to get a few things from his parents, and my mom confronts me about buying the computer. She's asking me if Justin was happy about buying this computer, if he had any say so in it.... and I'm feeling like she's attacking my relationship with my husband and ofcourse I flip out. This is a constant thing now. We've been living with my mom for a couple of months, and it just won't stop. We spend too much money, we don't make the right choices, nothing we do is good enough! I've even tried spending time with her, and no. She wants nothing to do with me. My mom has a lot of personal issues that she's dealing with, but I think sometimes she uses those issues as an excuse. It's like her problems are bigger and more important than listening to my problems, or taking the time to have some mother-daughter time. I'm so tired of it!

For instance, she and dad bought me a nice sewing machine for Christmas last year, but I had to fight tooth and nail for her to just show me how to use it. My mother is the master crafter. She can sew anything, make anything... she's amazing. She learned from her grandmother and I think even a little from her mom.... so why doesn't she want to show me? I can quilt.... which menas basically all I know how to do right now is sew squares together. I want to learn how to make all kinds of other things, but when I ask her if she can help me, it's like I asked her to walk on fire or something. I'm finally at a point in my life when I want to spend time with her and be a friend.... and she doesn't want me. Where do I go from here?

8.20.2009

School is BACK!

Yesterday was my first day back to school in THREE years! I was excited, terrified, nervous, stressed, but mostly excited! I might be a nerd, but I love buying the school supplies, putting together my notebooks, etc etc etc. Guess it's a good thing I want to be a teacher!

My first class of the day was Psychology, and my professor was NUTS! That said, I have never had more fun in a class. She kept my attention, she was humorous, and she specialized in autism when she first started working as a psychologist. In my book, that's pretty amazing! My second class of the day was Expository & Creative Writing. That wasn't my favorite class, but the professor was also awesome. I don't particularly like to write... I mean I like to blog ofcourse, but actually sitting down and having to write about a certain subject and staying on that subject, is not my forte! My last class of the day was College Algebra, I am not a huge fan of math... however I enjoy certain aspects of math. I like algebra, but I don't like word problems or graphing, lol! That professor was very nice, she's an older lady and has issues with technology, ha, but other than that she was pretty cool. I'm also taking Sociology, Success and Study Skills (stupid freshmen class) and my College Algebra Lab online. Those are going to take a lot of commitment on my part... but so far so good!

Anyways, the whole point of this entry was to talk about succeeding. I am alllllll about succeeding right now. I am set on doing well, getting amazing grades and reaching my goal. I don't want to be perfect, but I want to do well. I did ok in high school, I had a 3.63 average when I graduated, but considering some of the grades I got, I'm not sure how that happened! I did horribly in sciences and social studies.... I NEVER got higher than a C in any social studies class I took, and I did ok in science, but I think I might of only gotten an A once, lol! I did pretty well in math, had some issues with English, and ofcourse I succeeded in all of my music courses. But I think most of my problem was that I couldn't focus in class... I had friends in ALL of my classes, so ofcourse I wasn't focusing! This might sound crazy, but I'm kind of glad I don't know anyone in my classes right now! I learned more in one day than I ever remember learning in hs! I was focused, driven and I didn't have any distractions, and it ROCKED! So yes... if you readers are out there... please pray that I will continue to succeed and that someday I will achieve my goals!

8.15.2009

Frustrated

So apparently the economy is getting better.... then why is it that I can't find a job? I had an interview with a family with 4 children Thursday. They were, shall we say, different? A very odd couple with interesting children... that's a nice way of putting it. Well apparently their reasoning for not hiring me is because of my faith.... yea because I am a Christian. They don't want a Christian putting WRONG thoughts into their children's heads. Ok... first of all, I am a Christian, but if I am watching someone else's children, and they believe in something different, the last thing I am going to do is shove my beliefs down their throats. The parents are in charge of bringing up their children, NOT me. And ofcourse, since this isn't technically an official job, I can do NOTHING about this. UGH! That's all I have to say. I am VERY discouraged right now!

8.14.2009

Crazy Adventures, Orthodontist Appointments, Crazy Fruity Families Slip n Slides, Sprinklers, Montreat and Chuck E Cheez!

The summer is basically over... it's depressing and exciting! My lovely friend Hannah is going back to school this weekend, and I have no idea what I'm gonna do without here! We have basically spent every Friday night together and this is the first Friday night without her :(. Needless to say, I'm pretty bummed! She has one more year of school left and then most likely she is heading to Ireland for Graduate School. AH!

Anywho... so this summer has been a blast, despite the crazy chaos at work and the crazy drama at home. I have gone on crazy adventures with Hannah, including Danny's wedding, an orthodontist appointment, an interview with a fruity family... etc etc etc! Daniel's wedding was interesting.... we stayed in a hotel called the Microtel Inn & Suites. We got a room with one bed and it had mirrors EVERYWHERE!!!! It was GREAT. We went on a little adventure yesterday.... I had an interview with a blended family of 4 kids... that was different.

One of the highlights of my summer was babysitting Noah and hanging out with the Flint Kids. Noah is a little over a year old, and he is precious. I took him everywhere this summer, including the creek in Montreat, the pool and AB Tech to get my books... haha! The Flint kids got to do the slip n slide and sprinkler at my house (I'll post pics at the end of this post) and my hubby and I took them to Chuck E Cheez a cpl nights ago. I can't wait to meet the new set of twins that will be welcomed into their family in 201o!

So basically this summer was a blast... and I'm going to miss it. Now I start a new adventure... I'm going back to school and possibly working for one of the greatest families ever... I guess we'll see what God has in store for me!

Hannah - We made it!
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My independance fries from Independance, VA
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Our beautiful room :)
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Laughing hysterically about our accomodations :-D
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Back to front, Bo, Emily, Snickers, me.... Housesitting for Dave Foraker!
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Noah's favorite.... sitting in the creek and throwing pebbles!
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My wonderful hubby Justin with Joseph & Joyann @ Chuck E Cheese
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Jesse & Me @ Chuck E Cheese
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Hannah all dressed up for Danny's Wedding
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Me being retarded as usual - dressed up for Danny's wedding
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Jesse
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Joyann
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Joyann
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Joyann
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Sudsy Jesse
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My buddy Joseph
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Splish splash!
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"Jo Jo"
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8.10.2009

Love Dare

As of today, I am taking the challenge. You can follow my 40 day walk here. Please pray for me!

8.05.2009

Cinderella

I LOVE this song, it's beautiful, sad, loving, precious..... yep. Steven Curtis Chapman sings this, and he is also the Christian singer that lost one of his adopted daughters. I was listening to this song as I was driving home from TN this morning and cried my EYES out! I started thinking about this precious little girl he lost, and then I started thinking about my mom and my grandpa..... and ugh. Music is passionate... music is just flat out AMAZING. I think I needed that cry!

She spins and she sways
To whatever song plays
Without a care in the world
And I'm sitting here wearing
The weight of the world on my shoulders

It's been a long day
And there's still work to do
She's pulling at me
Saying "Dad, I need you
There's a ball at the castle
And I've been invited
And I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone...

She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed
She wants to know if I approve of the dress
She says, "Dad, the prom is just one week away
And I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone
She will be gone

Well, she came home today with a ring on her hand
Just glowing and telling us all they had planned
She says, "Dad, the wedding's still six months away
But I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone